i am in the midst of trying to finish my last semester of my undergrad and life is doing it's own thing. alanas keeps playing in my head, isn't it ironic don't you think. when you finally feel like you have made some progress and gotten over a few humps and healed from wounds that you received. and then you find your self 10 steps back and trying to regain your focus again.
i am convicted that these things come up for a reason but i ask god why right now. i was actually having a good day, can't there just be one, once and awhile. i was thinking one class down, paper turned in exam completed well, and two more 3-5 page papers due by next monday. i am in the clear. emotionally i am doing pretty well. definitely better than other days and then WHAM...
maybe it is just i am hit with the reality that is my life and the hurts that still exist, that i haven't fully recovered from. i am not sure. gosh the thoughts are flying. who am i to even question what god is doing? he is a good and sovereign god who loves me very much. sometimes it is really overwhelming.
this is a very depressing post i am sorry life has been hard lately. there are many things that are on my mind as i graduate and look for a job and think about moving out and trying to understand what has happened in my life in the past year the good and the bad. i think i should stop thinking. it is better to not worry, god tells me that i might go and give it a try. he is usually right.
life is definiately a roll coaster right now. i need to open my hands and enjoy the ride, going up and down makes my stomach a little queezy.
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